Yet Another One On Friendship...

Sometimes I will be doing something and all of a sudden my mind will be triggered to thoughts of one of my past friends. At this point I remember them vividly, their smile, sense of humor, laugh or personalities. I begin to remember the good things about my past friends, the good times I had with them, the reasons that they became my friends to begin with. I wonder what they are up to now and I start to think whether or not I should give them a call just to see how they are doing.
Funny thing about it is that no matter how bad it ended I always remember the good and not the bad. It’s like my heart chooses to remember them as a friend and not an enemy. If I really try I can remember the reason that we stopped being friends. That specific comment, that attitude, that action or the simple fact that they moved on from our friendship when I was beginning to consider them as a huge part of my life. I can remember betrayal, backstabbing, smack talking, fights but what hurts more than anything for some reason are those that I loved even though I didn’t seem to matter much to them at all. My mind does not comprehend how a person can just see you as passing by even though you were always there for them no matter what.
I know I have problems with the idea of friendship (I have problems in General, lol). Its just that when people enter my life, when I allow them to enter my heart, I expect them to care about me, to genuinely love me. I know people say you have to love people as they are but I always do, it just seems like they don’t do the same towards me. Many times what I see is that people just let go, move on and forget about me. To this day I don’t understand why most people are like that. And I probably never will.