Monkey Rock

One day while I was living in Chico I found my self in a fairly depressed state. It was my day off from work, I had no class and I was sitting at home. I felt overwhelmed with a lot of things going on in my life and honestly, I just felt like giving up.

The day was dark and it was raining outside so I decided to go for a drive. Often when feeling like this I would drive and try to look for a place to just pray and meditate. Well this day was similar and yet different in many ways.

As I drove for a while, I found myself heading towards the hills in upper bidwell going towards the bear hole. It was then that something caught my attention, something that I had perhaps looked at before but never truly seen. My eyes were fixed on a large cross out at the foot of the hills leading towards "monkey rock" or "monkey face rock" as it is also known. I took a sharp left turn and headed towards this cross. I parked my car in the designated parking area and then rocked the rest of the ay in the rain. As I crossed the iron gate I found a walking stick that somebody left behind. I picked it up and I walked towards the newly discovered cross.

It had stopped raining but as soon as I arrived at the cross the rain resumed. I sat at the foot of the cross and I began crying. Crying because my situation was overwhelming. Crying because eve though I was constantly surrounded by people, I still felt lonely. Crying because I felt like nobody understood me. Crying because my life had lost the connection to God and I felt dry and dead inside. As I cried, I began to pray and talk to God and He spoke to me there, at that cross at the foot of monkey hill. He said words to me that were personal. He spoke Life back into me and into my situation.

The next week on my day off I returned to the cross, only this time it was sunny. I climbed half way up the hills and found an area with a small bench overlooking a man-made pond that was built next to the shooting range. The next week I returned and instead of stopping there, I kept walking. I kept moving and eventually I found myself at the top of monkey rock. I found a spot in the grass under a tree and I looked around and ended up finding that I could see all of Chico.

At this spot I could see the creek running through Chico and I was amazed at the way that the sun reflected off of the water. I could see the entire city and it was amazing! There I began to restructure my relationship with God. That is where I spent my days off as I talked to God and listened closely to hear his voice. That is where I read his word and meditated upon his parables. That is where I established my prayer closet.

Honestly, I miss Chico. I miss it all. I miss Bear creek and I miss upper bidwell. I miss lower bidwell on a sunny day when my friends and I would toss the pigskin around. I miss mobbin' down 20th and also the Esplanade, just cruising the day away. But beyond all of that, I miss my prayer closet on monkey rock. I still have a prayer closet of course, but Monkey Rock will be something I will always remember and love.